January 1...
VERSAILLES, France – Some 486 rally-prepared vehicles (282 cars, 73 trucks, 131 motorcyles)start from in front of the famed Palace. All carry mandatory survival equipment, including Mark Thatcher model signaling mirror (the British PM’s son was lost in the Sahara for several days on a previous P-DR). First obstacle for competitors is negotiating way through throngs of transfixed tyre-kickers. (spectators numbered over 300,000).
January 2…
ALGIERS, Algeria – Rallyists transported across Mediterranean by ferry. Press contingent flies in decrepit twin-engined Fokkers. Sign landing card and waiver form with shaky hand – suffering somewhat from bouts of typhoid, cholera, yellow fever, tetanus and malaria - legacy of preventative shots to counteract possible plagues in remote regions ahead.
January 3…
GUARDIA, Algeria – Already 30 dropouts, with one Japanese biker killed. Overnight bivouac near primitive landing strip in desert. Little sleep as vehicles arriving all night at checkpoint in freezing cold. Africatours – caterers to the 1000 competitors, 350 organisers, journalists and assorted camp followers – begin serving first of 70 tons of food. Midnight fare: pea soup, beef stew, rice pudding – all in same plate. Wash plate with tea.
January 4…
ELGOLEA, Algeria – Bivouac at desolate oasis with one shriveled palm tree surrounded by endless barren landscape. No toilet for hundreds of miles. Wag suggests squatting in distance with hand over eyes for privacy. Hear that competitor Nabila Kashoggi, daughter of world’s richest man, waits until dark. Follow suit but realise too late that Miss K probably has flashight.
January 5…
AIN SALAH, Algeria – Roam camp at night seeking clever quotes from famous people. See several personalities in their underwear. Previous P-DR winner Jacky Ickx (Belgian F1 and sportscar star) says he loves desert because hostile environment makes him feel humble. Henri Pescarolo (F1 and sportscar veteran) says his father, a shrink in Paris, thinks he’s crazy. Canadian racer John Graham says, “This event is insane.” Conduct informal interview with Prince Albert of Monaco in unique atmosphere of camp latrine behind sand dune. Prince tells of rear door of his vehicle flying open today and royal luggage biting dust.
January 7…
TAMANRASSET, Algeria – Only 323 vehicles left. Have yet to see a camel. Suspect even camels fear to tread in this terrifying terrain. Surrounding Hogar Mountains make Grand Canyon look like playground sandbox. Toll today includes five cars rolled, three burned to a crisp,, two trucks destroyed falling off mountain. Press helicopter also crashed. Told this is par for the course, as last year a press plane belly-flopped into dune while zooming in for action closeup. Wrecked plane is still there.
January 8…
AGADEZ, Niger – Met hugely popular French singer/songwriter Daniel Balavoine, along for the ride to publicise P-DR African Aid project to bring water wells to the African desert. Chat with Mrs. Bjorn Borg, who seems not unhappy to be returning home to Monaco after her car’s chassis broke in two. Au contraire, Miss Kashoggi (attired like a bag lady in toque, pedal pushers, frayed sweater, knee socks and quarter inch layer of dust) says her "big adventure is exciting…different…fun. I’m enjoying every minute of it.”
January 9…
DIRKOU, Niger – Raging sandstorm grounds aircraft in most remote oasis to date. Dirkou airport a tattered windsock and cluster of rusting oil drums in the middle of nowhere. Camel comes into view led on a rope by a nomadic Tuareg tribesman swathed in sheets. Sheets make sense as sand invades every orifice. Camel makes sense as press planes get stuck in sand. Spend afternoon pushing mired aircraft around. Major problem posed by massive Hercules cargo plane (hauling communications equipment – Rally info bounced off satellite over Sahara back to Paris and out to the world). Problem eventually solved by nearly 100 people pushing and heaving in unison. Clean teeth with Heineken. Not recommended. Spend sleepless night huddled in flapping tent behind ineffectual oil drum windbreak.
January 10…
DIRKOU, Niger – 138 vehicles rendered hors de combat yesterday. Ms Kashoggi, backseat driver to two experienced British rallyists, among retirees. Her father earned fortune in Mid-East oil. Her Mitsubushi Pajero ran out of fuel in Sahara. He’s sending a plane to take her back to civilization. Ms K is still enthusiastic. “We spent the night in the desert. It was incredible – the sky was full of stars and there was absolute blackness…What an adventure! I’ll be back next year for sure.” John Graham (his Land Rover cracked in two) also out of the running. “I’ll be back again, but not for the adventure, I’ve had enough adventure for a lifetime.”
January 11…
ZINDER, Niger – Meet Thierry Sabine, mastermind and one-man show behind P-DR. (Bearded, sandal-shod, nattily attired in an immaculate white jumpsuit, the somewhat mystical Parisian is nicknamed ‘Jesus’ for habit of dropping out of sky in his white helicopter). His motto for the Rally: ‘A challenge for those who go. A dream for those who stay behind.’ He agrees to an interview somewhere down the road. Wash hands in tea but run out of deodorant. Now smell like pro as opposed to rank amateur.
January 12…
NIAMEY, Niger – Look for bike rider to interview. These types easy to spot in bivouac as all stagger or limp with bulging eyeballs that tend to spin. Other competitors think they’re nuts, bouncing along alone 12 hours a day astride bellowing engine. Approach No. 108 entrant, in Darth Vader helmet and weird leather suit. Nicole Bassot is charming French nurse in real life (only other female bike rider crashed badly and flown out to Paris in coma) in her fourth and final P-DR. “It’s very tiring and not for women because the bikes are too heavy.It is very dangerous for us.”
January 13…
NIAMEY, Niger - Survivors have day off to lick wounds, clean teeth, take showers in headquarters hotel. Only 168 machines left and many object to severity of eighth annual P-DR. Thierry Sabine holds press conference to defend himself. “The Rally must be more difficult each year. I set the route, then it is sport. Man must always be more important than machine.” Some stressed entrants take his nickname in vain.
January 14…
GAO, Mali – Must be most isolated outpost in all three million square miles of Sahara. Timbuktu, about 200 miles west, is the nearest major metropolis. Mali is at war with neighbouring Birkina Faso (formerly Upper Volta). Press planes land in blizzard of sand. Quickly surrounded by barefoot soldiers wearing WW2 Russian-issue greatcoats. All passports seized and we are herded into fenced enclosure. Photographer has camera confiscated, then returned for equivalent of $40. Other ransoms are paid for watches, wallets, etc. Annual Mali per capita income of $160 (second lowest in world) is raised handsomely by P-DR. Sabine negotiates settlement with captors, then takes off in his white chopper into teeth of gathering sandstorm.
January 15…
BAMAKO, Mali - White helicopter crashed into sand dune and smashed to smithereens last night, killing all five on board: Thierry Sabine, Daniel Balavoine, two French journalists and the dashing blond Swiss pilot, a cousin of Prince Albert. With Sabine gone everyone is in shock and the future of the Rally is in doubt. “The Rally is now headless,” says Jacky Ickx, who claims he used to joke with Sabine that he was a sadist creating an event for masochists. The Thierry Sabine Organisation decides to fulfil wishes expressed in founder’s last will and testament that in the event of his death the Rally must continue. And so it does, after one minute’s silence and tears at the morning briefing. Make deal with Swedish journalist to trade places after tomorrow. I’ll ride in his car following the route while he takes plane.
January 16…
LABE, Guinea – Mournful Daniel Balavoine dirges played over Fokker intercom. Just 149 machines gather at airport bivouac. TSO announces simplification of route through world’s worst desert in southwestern Mauritania – otherwise there may be no finishers. Many think event is jinxed. Press plane now missing with three passengers. Swedish journalist stumbles into camp having rolled car.
January 17…
LABE, Guinea – We bake another day in the heat as P-DR halted to regroup, restore morale and muster new courage. Total of 69 machines wiped out yesterday in one of worst stages to date. Wash in coffee. A mistake as caffeine odour in tent causes insomnia.
January 18…
TAMBACOUNDA, Senegal – Lost press plane returns (it ran out of fuel in desert) and journalist passengers hug everyone within reach. Take burro-powered cart taxi into town ($2). Man offers a woman for $4 or a litre of bottled water for $4. Water supply quickly sells out.
January 19…
DAKAR, Senegal – We take off in Fokker looking for any port in severe sandstorm. Finally, with two minutes fuel to spare, Dakar is found by flying out over Atlantic ocean and coming into land under enormous dust cloud. Fokker pilots make show of kissing airport tarmac. They say they were not joking. Check into hotel. Take 4 showers (3 with clothes on). Rally halted – zero visibility. Jacky Ickx, in second-placed Porsche 959, is fearful: “I’m very happy there are only two days to go but I’m also terrified. Anything can happen.” Casualty toll so far: 6 dead, 21 seriously injured, countless walking wounded.
January 22…
DAKAR, Senegal – P-DR ends with 100 vehicles 71 cars and trucks, 29 motorcycles crossing finish line. Competitor heroes mobbed in streets. Honda-mounted biker Cyril Neveu won for the 5th time, Porsche team of Rene Metge/Dominic Lemoyne finished first in car class, Mercedes truckers Giacomo Visarana/Guilio Minelli won their class. Rush around looking for wrap-up quotes. Grab limping biker with cuts on face and arm in sling. Hubert Auriol from Paris has been in all eight P-DR events and won twice. He’s still ecstatic: “When you fly over a massive sand dune at 100 miles an hour it’s such an intense sensation you can’t measure the thrill.” His thrill ended this year on rocks that broke his shoulder and destroyed his bike. But he’ll be back if there’s another Paris-Dakar Rally because: “It’s the most fantastic experience you can have in sport.”
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